Grace and dignity.

So my item was SOUNDLY rejected for this year's RPG Superstar contest. Am I bitter? Heck no.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Y_3NqrYrP0&feature=youtu.be

Now Hitler...HE is bitter!

How to deal with argumentative players?

                                 

    It's a problem that's been around for just shy of 40 years now, and will probably be around for at least 40 more. Most commonly, the disputes that arise are due to:

• Different ideas about what a certain rule or ability does
• A mistake on the player's part that makes them want to strong-arm the GM into a "do-over"
• An idea or plan that a player has fallen in love with, and cannot accept has failed to produce results

    My favorite means of dealing with this behavior is to nip it in the bud by laying out a set of ground rules at the start of a campaign. Lots of GMs like to prepare a campaign packet beforehand, letting the players know some back story for the game, listing important factions and NPCs, as well as specific materials and books they recommend. All of this information doesn't need to take up more than a page or two, and can serve as the spoonful of sugar for the medicine that is a final page of campaign policies

    The term policy has a very firm connotation. It is most likely that your players have all encountered policies in their work or school lives, and so they know that such things are taken seriously by whoever has set them. Subtle things like this can, over time, make all the difference.

    A way to set the tone with a new group of players is to (politely) insist that they roll their stats in front of you, explaining that it simply a matter of personal policy in how you like to run your games and no particular reflection on your trust in them. It sends the message that you have a handle on your game, and are not afraid to induce a little squirming to maintain that handle. If you have the luxury of a longtime gaming pal in your otherwise new group, make sure that the new players see her rolling stats in front of you as well, so they get the message that there will be no favoritism.

    One policy I've found to work very well is an edict against rules-lawyering. We're only human and we will make mistakes when it comes to a strict interpretation of the rules. These mistakes might, if left uncorrected, even have a seriously negative impact upon the player character(s) they are affecting.

    This changes nothing.
   
    Most of us only have a limited amount of time during any given week to come together and indulge in our little slice of escapism, and if that time is eaten up by one person rifling through books and heatedly debating their nuances, it is a disservice to everyone else at the table. Don't allow it, don't engage in it. Simply do your best to become familiar with the rules (so you make the fewest mistakes possible), and explain to your players that any concerns should be made a note of, and discussed with you at the end of the game, preferably in private.

    If and when you realize you've made a mistake (it happens to the best of us!), be sure to smilingly concede the point. This is not a competition, and even a hint of non-ironic pouting might instill an "us versus him" mentality that you really want to avoid. You shouldn't ever retcon something that has happened in game, but you can make it up to the player by offering a little extra XP, a hero point, or maybe even a new magical item that's just their size (this last should ideally be worked into the story as smoothly as possible).

    If the mistake resulted in the actual loss of a character, even that isn't an unfixable situation. Even the best fantasy stories of all time have their contrivances and miraculously improbable resurrections! Simply whip up an excuse to save them, and then give them a shot at coming back in dramatic fashion, maybe even somehow carrying new plot information and a nice chunk of free XP they didn't have before.

    What about generally cantankerous behavior? Some otherwise great people can turn into real passive-aggressive ogres around the game table, muttering about this and glaring after that, or getting all worked up over something else. Don't put up with it! It's important that you, as the GM, enjoy the game as much as anyone else. My remedy for this has two parts -

    First, consider the teachings of Pavlov. Conditioned behavior is a real thing, and can result in all sorts of positive changes. If a player is getting snarky and unpleasant, consider making their character's life subtly more difficult. The key word here is subtly. As tempting and hilarious as it may seem to drop a house on them, this will only exacerbate the bad behavior. However, if you do small things when they get out of line, it will eventually have an effect. Declare them to have failed a Will save that they actually just BARELY would have made, as though the DC had been a single point higher for them. Perhaps they get a slightly lower ratio of useful loot than the rest of the party, or perhaps they miss a trap they otherwise might have found. Skill checks and saves are the best way to go about this without them catching directly on.

    The other side of that is to reward them when they are being pleasant to game with. Maybe an NPC is a little nicer to them, they make a save they otherwise would have just BARELY failed, or the treasure the party finds is just a tiny bit (10% or so) richer than they would otherwise have expected. This works wonders if done properly.
   
    Secondly, a discrete one on one conversation. Don't stop the game to tell them to knock it off, because the satisfaction you'll feel will come at the cost of embarrassment and resentment on behalf of the offending party, and could possibly escalate into a shouting match that splinters the group. Simply take them aside at some point, ideally after calling a ten minute break (a good idea for any game), and let them know that this isn't okay. You're doing your best, and you get enough harassment from your boss/teacher/customers that you don't need it here, in a game you're trying to facilitate for their enjoyment. Be sure to remain relaxed during this conversation, and if they get defensive just let them get it out of their system. If they have a specific complaint, address it, sure. But let them know that this isn't the way to go about bringing it to your attention, or making their voice heard. Remind them of the policies outlined at the start of the campaign, and if they can't get a handle on it, it may be time to amicably part ways.

    Of course that isn't something anybody wants to happen.

    Remember - you aren't there to be a smug tyrant god that lords your power over your friends for four hours a week, but neither are you there to be a punching bag upon which they can take  out frustrations  that they simply can't vent on other, more serious authority figures. Do your best to keep the PCs the stars of the show, but don't be a doormat. Be even handed in the choices and calls you make, and stand by those rulings even if the player doesn't agree. Above all, don't let your group lose sight of the fact that it is just a game, and that anger over a game is behavior befitting of children.

Personae Malevolent 12 - Turducken

Turducken 

CR 3
XP 800
N Small magical beast (4d12 lbs)
Init +4; Senses darkvision 60 ft., low-light vision, scent; Perception +9

DEFENSE
AC 17, touch 15, flat-footed 13 (+3 Dex, +2 natural, +1 size)
hp 27 (3d10+12)
Fort +5; Ref +7; Will +6

OFFENSE
Speed 40 ft, Fly 40 ft, Swim 20 ft

Melee
Peck +5 (1d6)
2 Lesser Claws +3 (1d4)
2 Greater Claws +3 (1d6)

Special Attacks: Warble, Leap

STATISTICS
Str 10, Dex 18, Con 18, Int 2, Wis 20, Cha 6
Base Atk +3; CMB +2; CMD 17 (21 vs. trip)
Feats Multiattack, Weapon Finesse
Skills Perception +9, Stealth +12, Survival +6

SPECIAL ABILITIES

Warble (Su)
Once every 1d4 rounds as a standard action, a turducken can generate a mind-affecting effect by warbling "Gobuakuk!". Every non-turducken  in a 60 foot radius takes 2d6 points of nonlethal damage and is Fatigued as though they had not eaten for 3 days, and are therefore starving.   (DC 16 Will save for half and no fatigue). The save DC is Constitution-based.

Nonlethal damage from thirst or starvation cannot be recovered until the character gets food or water, as needed—not even magic that restores hit points heals this damage.

Leap (Ex)
A turducken can perform a special kind of pounce attack by jumping into combat. When a turducken charges, it can  jump into the air and land next to its enemies, then follow up with four claw attacks against foes in reach. When a turducken pounces, it cannot also peck.
   
ECOLOGY
Environment - Forests and low hills
Organization - Solitary, mated pair, or grand feast (3-9)
Treasure none (Unspoiled carcass is worth 400 gp)

The turducken is a chimeric beast along the same lines as an owlbear or hippogryph. They only appear near human settlements around harvest time each year, and it is rare to find more than one at a time.
A majestic comb crowns its head like a juanty pompador, matching nicely with its rather dapple waddle and aerodynamic beak. When swimming, the fore and rear legs fold in close to the body to allow the central webbed feet to kick.
Elusive beasts, turduckens trust in their natural camouflage to keep them out of sight when hungry humans are about. If it becomes evident that escape will be impossible the turducken will launch itself heedlessly into battle against its pursuers, upon whom it will unleash the raw fury that has slumbered within the hearts of turkeys, ducks, and chickens for generations.

POST MORTEM SPECIAL ABILITIES

FEAST
These beasts are much prized by the finest chefs in the land. A cook must prepare a turducken with a DC 20 Craft: Cooking check to unlock its hidden potential.

Everyone that eats at least 1/4 lb of turducken meat receives a +1 morale bonus to all saves for 2 hours. If more than two portions are consumed in the span of one day, the imbiber must succeed at a DC 20 Fort save or be Slowed for 10 rounds, then remain Fatigued until they take at least 30 minutes to nap.

DRUMSTICKS
Anyone who eats one of the turducken's legs receives the effects of a Cure Light Wounds as cast by a 1st level Cleric.

LEFTOVERS
Turducken meat will never ever spoil.

Beginner Box!

We had the opportunity to get together with some people and try out the new Pathfinder Beginner Box over at Dungeon's End in West Duluth.

Pictured clockwise above, our group consisted of two people with very limited experience with the Pathfinder RPG (Miranda and Addam), one player with none whatsoever but a goodly amount of 3.5 experience (Max), and one that hasn't touched any sort of RPG in about ten years (Greg). I'm the yeti standing in the back by the dragon mural.

So nope, couldn't get any TOTAL newbies, but that will change when I use this bad boy to teach my in-laws how to play sometime this winter!

Once everyone was assembled, we decided it would be better to get going as quickly as possible, and so we used the pregenerated characters right out of the box. A cursory glance over the sheets was enough for most of the players, though Greg needed the occasional reminder of how skill checks worked. It took us about two and a half hours to play through the premade scenario, though that was due at least in part to us doing a fair amount of goofing off.

This mini-module managed to show off -
Three puzzles
Skill checks for swimming and climbing
The benefits of using Diplomacy instead of violence (or at least it would have if the players hadn't decided to launch an ambush...)
and the importance of strategy!

                                                                        

                                                  (Not pictured: strategy)

There was a lot of magical loot for a level 1 adventure, but there was also a lot of peril in the form of creative encounters that didn't have much patience for sloppy tactics. Sending the wizard into an unexplored area first triggered a chain reaction that brought the party within a single hit point of a TPK...but then the cleric got to test out the "channel energy" mechanic, and it made her a big damn hero!

 

All of this was a good time, but what I find most impressive about this box is that the premade adventure and characters are a tiny part of its worth. The (glossy and full color) books contained inside of it are actually all you'd need to run a campaign up to level 5.

They include several dozen premade monsters, random encounter tables for just about every kind of environment, and a skin and bones version of the town of Sandpoint. Add to that the concise and neat blank character sheets and the simple grid on the other side of the dry-erase flip map, and you're set for several months of quality games.

I expected this to be pretty good as a way to introduce people to the game, and it turned out to be a lot more. The hard cardboard "pawns" seem to be made of the same adamantine-infused paper as the Pathfinder GM screen, and they are a terrific midpoint between 2-D pogs and plastic miniatures. They also keep the cost down to a trim 35.00, and allow for a lot more critters to be stored away!

Our demonstration has Dungeon's End looking at getting a store copy of the boxed set for free use, so be sure to stop in and ask about it if you'd like to give it a whirl yourself. This is an absolutely terrific addition to our collection, and something we'll be bringing with us whenever we travel with friends!

Personae Malevolent 11 - Yellow Musk Sporebearer

Yellow Musk Sporebearer

CRUNCH

 Yellow Musk Spore Bearer
CR 2
XP 600
NE Medium plant
Init +1; Senses darkvision 60 ft.; Perception +0
DEFENSE
AC 13, touch 11, flat-footed 12 (+2 natural)
hp 2 (2HD)
Fort +0, Ref +0, Will +3
DR 5/slashing; Plant traits
OFFENSE
Spd 35 ft.
Melee slam +3 (1d6+3)
Special Attacks - Burst

STATISTICS
Str 14, Dex 13, Con —, Int —, Wis 10, Cha 10
Base Atk +1; CMB +3; CMD 13
Feats: Fleet
SQ plant traits, staggered
SPECIAL ABILITIES
Plant Traits (Ex)
This zombie's animation is provided not by necromancy but by the plant that grows throughout its body. Yellow musk zombies lack undead traits, but gain plant traits. They are treated as plants, not undead, for the resolution of magical effects and attacks. Channel energy cannot harm a yellow musk zombie, for example, nor does negative energy heal a yellow musk zombie.
 

Staggered (Ex) Zombies have poor reflexes and can only perform a single move action or standard action each round. A zombie can move up to its speed and attack in the same round as a charge action.
 

Burst (Ex)
As either a swift action, or an automatic response from being dealt damage, the Spore Bearer can cause it's body to explode into a cloud of dark yellow pollen.
Everyone standing within 40 feet of the Sporebearer needs to make a Fortitude save. DC 12 if out to 40 feet, 14 within 30, 16 within 20, 18 within 10, and DC 20 if directly adjacent. If the save is failed, the spores take root inside the nasal passages and begin to grow into a miniature version of the Yellow Musk Creeper that spawned it. The subject is Nauseated [unable to attack, cast spells, concentrate on spells, or do anything else requiring attention. The only action such a character can take is a single move actions per turn.] from the overwhelming pain, and suffers 1d4 points of int damage per round, during each of which the victim may attempt a new save.    

FLUFF

When a Yellow Musk Creeper gets to a certain size and age, there is a 10% chance that one of the zombies it creates will continue to undergo physiological changes until it becomes little more than skin bursting with yellow pollen. This quasi-undead creature then lurches off in search of the living, and has just enough awareness to try and burst itself in the midst of as many animals (or people) as possible.

Let's Play the Tomb of Horrors; Episode 3

Next part is up! Seems like not everyone is enjoying the gargoyle encounter...

Episode 3

Let's Play the Tomb of Horrors; Episode 2

Part 1

Part 2